Mr Bad Media Karma

A cursory peek into my fucked-up life. Rants and raves, musings and madness - come get your piece of me.

Monday, November 28, 2005

A Penny For Your Thoughts...

When does that turning point come? I've got this very fucked up analogy but if you really think about it you'd get what I mean. Say I give you a dollar. "Simon that's so lame, a dollar is pittance!" Yes it is. But let's say I keep on giving you another dollar. One becomes two, two becomes three, so on and so forth. When is the point when you would go "Hey this is a lot of money!" Which dollar changes the 'pittance' to 'a lot'? Or to make things simpler and more cliche, when does that straw that finally breaks the camel's back come? And does it come as a sudden shock or is it more like creeping inevitability that is expected? Should I have known from the first time? Or was it something I suddenly realised, BAM, just like that. I'm not sure. But I'll tell you one thing, I am sick and tired of it all. More or less la. This dam's been breached. I'm not going to bother any longer. Not like you ever did.

Saturday, November 26, 2005

confessions

I intended to post about the fiasco that was my relative's wedding dinner last night, but I really can't be bothered right now.

I choose to remain in this...thing, whatever it is. So I don't expect pity. But make no mistake it does frustrate and irritate me to no end. It's like Tong all over again la. Fuck.

-I don't want easy, but you're just too hard-

I just don't understand you. I really don't. Why make things so damn complicated?

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Over.

Am I the ONLY one who is quite shocked about Jessica and Nick? I guess I'm so used to being cynical about what the tabloids and magazines say that I paid no heed whatsoever to the months and months of rumours and stories splashed across the front pages. Isn't it ironic that their getting married eventually resulted in their seperation? Of course this is PURELY speculation on my part, but I'm guessing that part of the reason for this split was because Jessica's star shone so much more brightly than Nick's and because of the saturation press coverage focused on their relationship. I mean let's not forget that 3 years ago, she was a B-list has-been who never made it to Britney/Christina status and he was the former member of a B-list boyband that never made it to BSB/N'sync status. And then they got married. Newlyweds came out. And within a matter of months Jessica had shot to A-list status, while Nick...well Nick's star power was raised by association. I'm on team Simpson, but I'd GLADLY be on team Lachey if he, you know, picked me to replace her =D

My friends reacted in different ways. Cindy was like "gosh, so many celebs are seperating. But Brad and Jen was the worst." Lena was all "OMGOMG where did you hear about this? So sad so sad!" Michael went "That was rather expected what." Tim didn't bother to reply (thanks ah). Meng was so cavalier about the whole thing la. "Oh dumb wives usually get on their husband's nerves after a while." I suppose that IS true. I guess I'm still a hopeless romantic at heart. Which is kindda ironic isn't it? But yes. Deep deep deep down inside, I believe in true love and all that. I think. Watching Brad and Jennifer, Adrian and Tammy (lol...aka my brother and his gf of 4 years) and now Nick and Jessica break up in 2005, it's made me wonder how different things are once they've settled down and the initial euphoria has faded. I really do wonder what that is like. At least we still have Tonglissa =p

Ah...tomorrow should be fun. My t-shirt is QUITE slutty indeed! In case you've been living in a cave for the past few weeks, PURPLE is IN now because MADONNA says so. Ha!

In memory.


This was taken only a few days ago! Gucci Spring Fashion Show. Surely they must have known by then. I wonder what was going through their heads. Final public apperance as a couple.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Crap

I was supposed to go to the gym today. But I'm really not in the mood. It's COLD and I don't think I'll feel very nice working out in the air-conditioned environs of Cali. Altho' the air-con there is quite shit...but that's not the point. I'm dressed in the most hobo clothes right now la. Oversized RIP CURL (yes I know, the horror) t shirt, bermudas that are too long to be bermudas and extend well beyond the knee...also RIP fucking CURL if I'm not wrong (WTH). I look like shit. Except for the fact that I'm wearing my new glasses =)

Looking at myself in the mirror now, this "look" was SO last year la. I would have dressed like that a year ago or in 2003. I'm embarassed. I never thought I would be one to look back at photos of myself in younger days and *cringe*, but I'm sort of doing that right now. And I want to punch that idiotic Simon I see when I was like 10-12. How did ANYONE tolerate me back then? Gosh.

I guess if I take nothing else away from it, at least he taught me how to be myself, not to be afraid to express it once in a while, and to stop dressing in clothes 3 sizes too big. I wonder if he even knows how much it has impacted me in the short time I've known him. I doubt.

It's time to go OUT. I hope I don't bump into anyone really. Don't wish to be caught in this AWFUL attire.

Monday, November 21, 2005

Some Cunning Punning

Q:What's the great thing about fucking twenty four year olds?
A:There are twenty of em =D

That IS funny.

Haha. No shit Simon. This week is going to be so damn sian. I hate regimentation and stuff. Going to work wouldn't be such a BLOODY CHORE if they just cut all the crap la. Seriously. Just CUT THE FUCKING CRAP. Stand-by-bed, having to arrange EVERYTHING according to RANK, personal bearing. It's ALL bullshit. Seriously. Stop trying to impose you ideals on us. We're being forced to do this. It's not like I choose to work in the SAF and earn less than minimum wage. I can barely support my present (rather frugal) lifestyle. Some facial products here, the odd pair of shoes, some nice clothes, and BOOM! That's it. I've spent more than I earn. Damn irritating. But I'm too lazy/am too ego etc etc to get a job. Whine whine whine. Moan moan moan. Sulk groan pout. Sigh. How am I EVER going to afford that lovely bag that costs urm...6 times my monthly pay. That's half a year. Dayum.

Saturday, November 19, 2005

Hmmm

Went out with Meng and Weiren today. Got lost in Marina. It's such a different place from a year ago. I want a pair of PRADA/DIOR/GUCCI sunglasses now! They're really not that expensive. I had an epiphany of sorts as I walked home from the bus stop in the drizzle. Maybe not technically an epiphany but it sure felt like some sort of enlightenment. I don't even know why I feel this way. I feel so light. Still. And so calm. Haven't felt this sort of calm for so long. Just at peace. I have NO idea why la...maybe it'd wear off by tomorrow. It's scaring me. I have absolutely no feelings whatsoever. No hurt, no happiness...nothing. It's refreshing.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

I Love New York

In tribute to Madonna's...well...tribute to New York on her new album(song's called I Love New York-duh), I have decided to display MY love for this wonderful town using pictures from my own personal collection. Here we go...

I don't like cities
But I like New York
Other places make me feel like a dork


Other cities always make me mad
Other places always make me sad
No other city ever made me glad except New York
I love New York


If you don't like my attitude
Then you can F off


New York is not for little pussies who scream
If you can't stand the heat
Then get off my street


I'm HUNG UP on New York. Among other things. I already did my own tribute somewhere in this blog. Read it and you'll be calling up your travel agent to get you on the first flight there. Sigh. I wanna go on holiday. But I have no money. And no company. How sad.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

I'm Sick

In more ways than one. But seriously I'm on MC tomorrow (161105) and the day after (171105). Would love to go out but that would be breaking the rules wouldn't it? I'm such an innocent, pure, good boy. You won't catch me breaking no rules =p

I must sound very sick. No la. It's just the flu.



She's just so pretty. So so pretty. I will be back later when my nose isn't fucking running like Marion Jones.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Vouge!

2 days of Madonna madness. First night at Zouk was pretty disappointing. They barely played anything from the new album even though it was SUPPOSED to be an album preview. I must have heard 30 seconds of Sorry and I Love New York(other cities make me feel like a dork). The highlights were the "confessions" segment, where the winner claimed to have slept with her husband to be's father the night before she was married (I can TOTALLY see that happening, she looked down right SLUTTY), and the portion where those who came dressed as Madonna were asked to prance down the stage and STRUT their STUFF. Naturally, the one who won was the tranny wearing the pink leotard with hotpants and a strawberry blonde wig. She was SUCH an attetion whore. Seriously. While the others just did the catwalk and went back very quickly, she really took her time, pruning and preening, posing for the camera, doing all sorts of Hung Up-esque dance moves. She even did the "lying on the floor album cover pose" la! What more could you ask for? As the DJ said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, MADONNA is in the HOUSE!." It was also really great to see Melanie there. Lovely lady.

After the party we decided to leave because they were basically NOT playing ANY Madonna music, or ANY music with WORDS period. It was just beats beats beats and I fucking HATE that type of music. Went to the coffeeshop nearby and had SO much fun BITCHING about Mariah. It was humbling to be in the presence of Madonna fans who know so much more than me and who have been fans since the 80s/early 90s!

Saturday's Madonna party at Happy was better. I only decided to go for it when Tong said he had to leave in the evening. Was supposed to meet some of the same people from the day before but well...hahaha...ended up meeting Mengsta instead. Happy has the most GORGEOUS pictures of Madonna pinned up all over. I really wanted to steal them. STEAL THEM ALL! They were actually playing Madonna music all the way from 9-11 (SO much better than Zouk) but the fucked up thing was that NO ONE was BLOODY dancing! The MC for the evening (who hosts some Kids Central show) asked us to gather in front of the stage. There was a Madonna quiz and whoever could run up to the stage first would basically win the prize. They were giving away Hung Up singles, vouchers for Confessions On A Dancefloor, and the grand prize was a whole bunch of Madonna singles, a t-shirt, and a white VINYL version of the song!! I knew most of the answers but didn't go up, party because I was shy and partly because I was waiting for the biggest prize, which I thought would be the Motorola ROKR phone(they gave away 2 at Zouk you see).

So Meng and I made our way to the front just below the stage. The final prize of course wasn't the phone but still, was pretty cool all things considered. Final question, difficulty mode "hard", was "Name ALL the movie stars mentioned in Vouge."
Now, I SHOULD know this really, and I was trying to run through the names when Meng basically just PUSHED me forward la. What the hell! So that provided the momentun and I went up on stage.

"Full names?"
"Yes."
*in my mind* FUCK.

For the benefit of those who do not know ANYTHING about Vouge, it was a HUGE SMASH way back in 1990. US, UK, OZ #1 (and many other countries). It was bigger than MUSIC. It was partly inspired by a dance performed by gay men in New York clubs, in which they used a series of complex hand gestures to imitate their favourite Hollywood stars, as well as the models on the magazine Vogue, hence the name of the song. Anyway, towards the end of the song, Madonna pays homage to the great, classic stars of Hollywood.

Greta Garbo, and Monroe
Dietrich and DiMaggio
Marlon Brando, Jimmy Dean
On the cover of a magazine

Grace Kelly; Harlow, Jean
Picture of a beauty queen
Gene Kelly, Fred Astaire
Ginger Rogers, dance on air

They had style, they had grace
Rita Hayworth gave good face
Lauren, Katharine, Lana too
Bette Davis, we love you


To cut a long story short, I breezed through all the way till James Dean, where I stumbled a little, and people started to get RESTLESS. I got REALLY nervous and my mind just went blank. But I managed to go all the way till Rita Hayworth and added in Bette Davis and Katharine Hepburn. And then...I JUST FORGOT the last two!! That second last line...I've never been very COMFORTABLE with it. I mean, seriously, I didn't even know who the fuck Lana (Turner) was until VERY recently! They called another guy up and he managed to name everyone except two, and his TWO were different from mine! So we filled in each other's blank spaces really. I was given another chance but could only remember Lauren Bacall. So yeah. FLOP. I lost. Sob Sob. I will NEVER ever forget those lyrics again! Haha this Caucasian man came up to me later and told me that I deserved to win based on looks. *ego trip*

Anyway yeah 2 days of Madonna madness. And I didn't even get to hear much of the new album! But it was really enjoyable, especially the second night la. Meng and I went to Whynot after that which was basically an even bigger ego trip. Hahaha. Danced our asses off to Hung Up, GET RIGHT etc etc. I don't need to do any cardio today. Well then. Don't just stand there, let's get to it, strike a pose, there's nothing to it, VOUGE!

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Weak

I succumbed. After Confessions On A Dance Floor leaked last week, I chose not to download any of the songs, thinking that I would actually put the $20 I was going to spend on the CD to SOME use. I didn't want to have heard all the songs and then buy the CD 2 weeks later and go..."Now what?" Also consider that I was just too damn lazy to go song hunting. I may LOVE Maddy, but I only do the crazy loony fan stuff when it comes to Brit (like spending money on a pathetic remixes CD which will be out in a fortnight).

So I downloaded just *one* song, How High, produced by Bloodshy and Avant(TOXIC, enough said). I also made the effort not to listen to it too many times, something like under 5. It's pretty ok.

But when Confessions appeared on MTV's The Leak yesterday, I just couldn't control myself. Thank goodness you can only play the album as a whole from the start to the end. So yeah I closed the file after the first three songs. Hung Up, Get Together and Sorry. An hour ago, I heard the latter two for the second time. MY GOD. Get Together is FAB. Seriously. Fab. It has this atmosphere about it that I LOVE in songs. Think Naughty Girl by Holly Valance, or the bridge of That's Where You Take Me. Ok I'm probably the only one who knows what I'm refering to here haha. Urm...one of those songs that is just relaxing yet manages to excite, to give that out of body feeling. Like when you're on a highway looking down at the sparkling sea below. I must sound mad. But yeah I love songs like that. Sorry is amazing too. I am a big fan of the different languages thing and it IS catchy and hooky. Cool robotic voices too. I always take a while to connect with songs(even something insanely catchy and gay like Hung Up), but I suspect it won't take me much longer to really DIG these other two. Hopefully the rest of the album is like this. Very few songs I like on first listen. One is Shakira's Don't Bother. Another one is Pink's Just Like A Pill. But I digress. It's ALL about MADONNA MADONNA and MADONNA now. I shall be at HMV on Monday to PURCHASE my discotastic copy of Confessions On A Dance Floor, and it'd be the first album I buy in quite a while. Naughty, naughty me.

All is not well in Simon-town right now. But I've said it all before.



DISCOTASTIC!

Friday, November 04, 2005

3 movies for the price of

3 la. Knn. $28.50 in three consecutive days of movie madness. First up was Transporter 2 with Cindy, Shao and Gerald. It was entertaining enough, although in retrospect it was really the ultimate cliche of an action movie offering little else. PAPER THIN plot, involving a bad guy trying to spread this deadly virus and a larger than life hero having to race against time to stop him. My goodness. Throw in plenty of martial art violence, fast cars and a PRIVATE PLANE for good measure, and top it of with explosions aplenty. Fucking crappy. Oh and the stunts the hero pulls off are really too good to be true, even by Hollywood standards. I'm not going to waste time, effort and brain cells on this anymore.

Movie #2 was hilarious. Dreamship Surprise. Oh God. It's basically a spoof of Star Wars and Star Trek with lots of GAY thrown in for good measure. I guess it's really no surprise that I was watching this with Luke 'more camp than a row of tents' Anthony. The world is about to be destroyed and the urm...Grand Council sends the gayguys back in time to save the world. Sounds great? Not when the actors are SO not cute. Anyway they have to HURRY because the MISS WAIKIKI paegeant awaits them. Of course it isn't so straightforward and they get transported to the wrong era more than once. *With German harshness* YA. Terribly trashy movie. Only the Germans would make something like this. But I enjoyed this one the most. I did.

Day #3 and movie #3. That honour went to Domino. Apparently based on a true story...sort of. Catched it with Lena and Tongieee. It reminded me of a violent version of Eternal Sunshine Of A Spotless Mind. At least in terms of the sequencing. Domino is basically a Bounty Hunter who gets into this terrible mess involving ten million dollars, the mafia and an ARM one fine day. I'm not going to give a summary. It's the best movie of the lot. Watch it. But yeah the scenes that I do remember are the 4 First Ladies (Macy Gray has a FABULOUS role in this movie), the fat black woman (world's youngest grandmother at 28) appearing on Jerry Springer with her chart of new racial groups, having a quick glimpse at the wonderful Shannen Doherty, the way Domino walks into the Bounty Hunter talk, how she makes smoking look SO DAMN SEXY AND COOL, and when she tells Lucy Liu (who is also FABULOUS) that she must want her pussy. I'm still quite confused with some details and I don't know why they decided to throw in religion and the crazy preacher in the desert but it was a pretty good movie. Definately the best of the 3. Although that isn't hard really to accomplish really. Really isn't.

So yes. The GOLDEN WEEK was semi golden I guess. In typical Simon fashion, there are some things I would have done differently if I could go back in time but hey I can't so tough luck no shit. Hmmm...Go watch Domino. It's quite good really.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

i only have myself to blame

I know that. My current situation is simply the result of poor decisions I made in the past, mainly things I didn't do. Back then I utterly failed to realise the consequences of not being active enough, especially during those 2 precious JC years. Sure I did have laughs, sure I did enjoy the company of my small AC circle. But look where that has brought me. I'm slowly drowning in regret. This goes way beyond him. If I had a clique, his apparent indifference wouldn't matter as much. But now there's basically almost no one else. And that is what gets to me.