I miss New York

The energy, the shopping, the fresh faces and surprises on every corner. Canyons of glass and stone and steel, the old and the new intermingled in one small island that packs such a punch.

And I miss the samazozis. Sometimes its easy to forget people you haven't seen in a while, but ever so often I'll remember what - mostly - great times we had and I wish the boys would just come back already.

Broken Strings

This has been a regular fixture on my playlist since I rediscovered the joys of downloading music. I listen to it because its a beautiful song which encapsulates the feeling of falling out of love with someone, a subject which isn't broached as frequently as say, falling in love (Underneath the Stars), or missing someone (We Belong Together) or post breakup euphoria (So What).

I listen to it because misery enjoys a melancholic melody. Because sometimes I wish my strings were broken, they're better off that way when they're not being strum.

But alas my strings are resilient - after all they've been through, and despite the power of logic and reason, they refuse to snap.

Morbid Musings

You know, since my flight from HK tp SG last year (bad turbulence), I've always wondered whether I'll ever have the bad luck to board a doomed plane. Especially since I love traveling and hope to fly a lot for work. And after this most recent plane crash in Buffalo... I've been having this sense of foreboding that one day - I don't know when, maybe next year, maybe 30 years from now - I will die in a plane crash. Hmm... we'll see what happens la.

If we were your mirrors

You'd see a Jocular, Intelligent, Nonpareil, Entertaining, Selfless and Handsome boy.

I wanna hold 'em like they do in Texas

I am in love with Lady Gaga. Caught the video for Pokerface on MTV yesterday (finally) and it was amazing. Everything a pop music video should be.

moremoremoremore!

I hope I don't regret it

I made one of those big life-changing decisions today. I don't think I'm being overly dramatic in saying that, because if the smallest decisions we make multiply (the butterfly effect?) and lead to substantial changes, then basically choosing to spend a year of my life in another country must be a seismic shift. In doing so, I also brought the curtains down on something I'd wanted so badly since I heard about it - the NYU LLM double degree. Ultimately, I decided that I didn't need it at this point, and putting aside the prestige issue, I didn't think it was worth the money + risking a whole year on exchange.

But I do wonder if I took the easy way out. Instead of being patient and waiting for a year, I basically opted for more instant gratification. A bird in hand is worth two in the bush. But I do wonder if I've somehow shortchanged myself in the process, choosing not to climb the mountain because I am afraid to fall.

And of course there are other reasons as well, reasons too eccentric to be verbalized, things you wouldn't like to hear about.

In any case now that the cards have been dealt, I'm going to make the best of it =).

Confessions

Everyone is in the mood for confessing and honesty these days. But I do get the feeling that what is written in all those Facebook notes is not so much 25 things people don't know about you, but rather 25 things you want people to know about you. Does that make sense? It's all about selling yourself and projecting the image you want people to have. And to my friends who have written notes, this isn't targeted at any of you, I'm just reflecting on general observations :) (Haha don't not tag me in your notes because of this please).

I used to do the confessional thing on my blog from time to time, and yeah to be frank, it was always about 'what impression do I want people to have of me' rather than 'oh I'm going to be really honest'. Real honesty can burn you real bad. Trust me on that.

I met an acquaintance today, someone who wrote for me while I was editorial coordinator at Trev all those years ago (actually less than 2 la but ya know). And he's based in HK, writing for some financial magazine, gets to travel about half the month, has been to every country in East Asia except for Taiwan and North Korea, is currently putting up at the Ritz, and is turning the ripe old age of 25 this year. I was secretly rather envious that someone barely 2 years older than myself has had so much more life experience. But well, he is American so he didn't have to go through that vortex known as National Service.

And he just sent me a message on Fb that went, 'Nice to catch up with someone as interested in the world as I am.' Gosh. That is true you know. Why am I in law school ah? All I wanted a year (or even less) ago was to work in an international firm doing corporate law and hopefully making a lot of money. But there is so much more to life than that and I am way too interested in other things to just let that all go for a life of legal niceties and technical jargon.

What to do... what to do... my passion for law is dissipating with each passing day