His Name Is Pig

Yesterday was a day to remember. I felt something I've never - ever - felt in my life. Fear. About getting fat.

Maybe it was the way I was sitting, maybe it was the hearty Japanese meal I had in the afternoon, maybe it was my eyes playing tricks on me after too many hours of focusing on words, but when I happened to look at my stomach (because uh...my t-shirt just happened to get displaced, nothing to do with my narcissism whatsoever), I saw *them*. Three layers of fleshy meat, like bloody three-layer pork, on MY stomach! I did a double-take. And then I got shit scared.

"I'll never get fat", was the mantra I used to repeat obnoxiously, to anyone and everyone who'd care (and more often than not, not care) to listen. I said it to my Mum (in response to what she told me about my brother complaining of his belly), I said it to Meng and Wei Ren, I said it to strangers at a party, and I most recently said it to Jin and ZX last week at dinner.

And now look at what's happened.

Maybe I exaggerate. It's not that I've turned into Jabba the Hutt in a week. But my stomach - even after a gym session and multiple sit-ups - doesn't seem as flat as it was. I've never had a defined 6-pack before - my stomach used to be slightly concave actually - but they were always fairly visible, without the need to flex. Now I need to strain my stomach muslces to see their faint outline...they're still there, still hard, but there seems to be a layer of wobbly flesh layered over now.

I realise this may actually be one of my most himbotic, self-indulgent posts ever (and THAT'S saying a lot), but I really am very worried that the much vaunted Simon Stomach is turning to mush, and that there's nothing I can do about it.

Actually there may be. I gym fairly regularly and I always ensure to work 'em stomach muscles, but I don't do cardio, because my body type is such that it's very hard for me to bulk up, and I was advised that cardio does nothing to help that. Add the fact that I don't enjoy prolonged suffering...

I will do something about it when the exams are over. But right now, I'm still gorging like a pig. Jin and I were in CJ Koh Lib for most of the day studying with nice people, but we did leave some time for working out - which ended up being a very bizarre stroll through the Botanic Gardens that involved more laughing than anything else - admittedly something that we needed - and a very 'anyhow' session in the school gym which of course lacked the variety that we're used to.

And then we went to EAT. Bad pasta at The Thinking Corner, and after the Commy music played (a signal to get the hell out of the library) we went down to Serene for...get this...ICE FUCKING CREAM (actually I had the two scoops of ice cream Jin was savoring...other visual delights) and...a McSpicy Meal! A fucking McDonald's meal! Which was very tasty but of course has done nothing at all to help my stomach. We started talking about our...very different political/societal views, all this stemming from him seeing Wee Shumin's picture on TOC. Let's just say that we probably wouldn't be in the same political party.

All that food. I feel like a slob. And you know what the BEST part is? We're fucking going for all you can eat tim sum tomorrow! Which I'm actually mucho looking forward to but WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN TO MY STOMACH?

Urgh. Tim sum's at 12 sharp tomorrow. I shall work till 4.30 and give myself the LUXURY of 6 full hours of hopefully blissful sleep, which would be double of what I had last night...desperate times, desperate measures. I'm going to HAR KOU heaven tomorrow!!